An unbearable truth

Hey.

           Today sucked as much as last night. Ah maybe its just a continuation from the previous. What to do? Nothing surprises me anymore, anyway. I'm just glad at least later i'll get to see Andrew, been a long time since i saw him in person. Right now, he is one of those who hasn't hurt me real big time yet. Cool huh?

            So you said you didn't know. You didn't know this, you didn't know that. Do you know how ridiculous it sounds? Why is it that everytime i ask for answers and explanations all you can tell me is you didn't know and you thought this would be blabla? Its like shrugging off all the blame and responsibilities and you expect me to believe that? To think when i was so freaking down, you were happy. Do you know how selfish that was? You left me with the impression that you were going to be down all the way, and then you went ahead to cheer yourself up. How does that work to make me feel better? You told me you didn't want me to worry, but for this case is different right? You left saying " fuck la whatever ". How does that help tell me?

           I don't understand. You hurt me so bad, and you say you love me. I told you, lets break up. You just don't want to. I don't understand. My heart aches.  I feel like ending my pain permanently. I really feel like it.....

           Farewell.